This Time Will Be Different!

 I know I have said this many times. But this time is different. I am afraid if I don't make changes
now, Princess Shaney (or I) will be dead before she is 16.
 Last week at counseling, the counselor more or less told me I needed to grow a pair and take
back control of my life instead of Princess Shaney having control. I told him that I would love
to have control back, but it scares me because I am so afraid that if I tell her no and hold to it,
she will cut or try killing herself again. And she knows that.
 I told him how I was so mad at her for ruining our plans for that upcoming weekend. How I was
hoping to spend time just me & her. How she doesn't care how much all of this is hurting me. And
destroying the rest of our family. She told him how I favor everyone else in the family and just
treat her like a baby. Which that made me more livid. Which my reply was; My whole life has revolved around you since you tried killing yourself the first time, in June. Everyone in the
family has been neglected because I focus every minute on you and if  you don't want to be 
treated like a baby, then grow up and start working on being happy and part of this family.
And if you want me to treat you like I do the other kids, hop on board cause things are going
to be big time different.
 Starting with that weekend. We did not go to the band competition. The night we were
supposed to go, was Halloween night. She asked me, Since we're not going, can I go hang
out with my friends & go trick-or-treating with them? I couldn't believe she had the nuggets
to ask me that! Are YOU kidding me? YOU ruined my plans and now you want to go hang
with Your friends! Not even going to happen. You're going with the REST of the family
to the Halloween party. She fought a lot over that, but I stuck to it and she went to the party at
my niece's house with the rest of us.
 The next thing she wanted was to go see Mayday Parade this past Tuesday night, which was a
school night. I told her the only way she could go was she had to promise she would get up the
next morning and go to school and she had to go to school everyday until Thanksgiving break.
Again, she promised. Wednesday morning came and it turned into fight on her end. I stuck to my
guns didn't fight with her, just said you promised. I'm not playing your games anymore. And she
went. This morning was another fight. But I still stuck to my guns and she ended up going.
 It sure does make my days go much better when I refuse to argue with her and let her walk all over me. I really enjoy things much more. I think she is starting to figure out that I'm not playing anymore and
things are really going to change around.
 I am so glad that I finally decided to grow a pair and take back control of my life!
Til We Meet Again! Pam
P.S.
Haven't done this for a few months, but I'm linking up with Shell over at 

She just drives me crazy!

Why does she do these things?
 Prince Kanard is in his High School marching band. They were going to state
championship this weekend.
Since competition is 3 1/2 hours from our town, I told Princess Shaney that we
would go down. I got us a room for 2 nights, and it was just going to be a trip for
me and her to spend some time together and do some bonding.
On Tuesday, she was sick and didn't go to school. I told her that she needed to go
to school on Wednesday and Thursday or she wouldn't be able to go. Well, she didn't
go on Wednesday.
When we went to counseling that day, I was livid and just fuming about the whole thing.
I told the counselor how she doesn't care about anyone or anything, but herself. Princess
Shaney told me to go and take Mr. Hubs, I told her I couldn't do that because I can't trust
you to stay home! She's like Wow! really mom? I was shocked when the counselor asked
her if she had given me any reason to trust her.  I told her that I can't trust her when I am
home, how am I supposed to trust her when I'm gone for 2 days.
Anyway, ended up staying home. Our school took state in 1A division! And I turned into
a done playing games mom!  We'll just see how long I can stick to it.
Until We Meet Again, Pam

WHY?!

Why does life with  Teenage Drama Queen have to be so difficult?
We have been trying for months to get Princess Shaney into a different
Jr. High. We found out yesterday that it was finally approved.
So this morning I called over to find out what we needed to do to get her
registered and get a class schedule. They said we would have to wait until
we got our letter from the district before we could get her enrolled and
registered. I knew it would be in the mail today, but we wouldn't be able to get there before they left for the day so I told them we would be in on Monday.
And then we have hair appointments Monday afternoon.
 Her friend (Princess T.) and her family were going to California today and Princess Shaney asked me Wednesday night if she could go with them. I told her
if they weren't  going to be back by Monday, then she couldn't go. Yesterday,
she told me Princess T's mom was going to call and talk to me about it. Nothing
more was said about until about 3:30 this afternoon. She asked again if she could go and told me they weren't coming home until Thursday. So, I told her no.
We have an appointment at the school & salon on Monday and she has her
counseling on Wednesday. OMG! You would have thought it was the end of the
world.
She starts in on how I treat her like a baby all the time and I don't trust her anymore and I never let her do anything, and on. and on. and on....
I'm like, seriously, please tell me you are not going to do this again!
This went on about 1/2 an hour and then it was like done... Nothing more has
been said.
Usually, she is really quite good about things when I tell her "no", but when it is
something she wants super bad then it turns into major drama. Luckily, in the almost 2 months since she has come home from the treatment center, this is only
the second time she has done this, the first time was about 5 days after she came
home. So, I guess I shouldn't complain too much. Or maybe that is why I do complain, because it doesn't happen very much and when it does, it just hits
everyone wrong and then no-one is happy for a few hours after it ends.
But, can I just say how happy I am that I did not give in!!! Yippie for me! I am getting excited that I am not being her door mat anymore! And I am learning to
pick my battles and I think she is learning that and that is why the drama only lasts a 1/2 now and not hours like it did before.
Until We Meet Again! Pam